Tired

Tired of inconstance and complaining, tired of "crocodile tears" and blaming, tired of the-not- enjoying-life feeling, tired of moody person, tired of the always-want- to-be somewhere-else refrain. Deeply sad and tired. We always think that what we really like is not where we are, and instead we can't imagine that we may miss it one day, when we don't have it anymore. I personally hated Liberia at my arrival and I really wished to be somewhere else as soon as possible. Now at least I accept it. And I can see what I will miss. And I can see what I enjoy and I can see that I like mission life, or at least, that working in this job context is what I find interesting. I wish of course a lot of other things and I hope it's possible to achieve them, even if they seem contradictory to mission life. I did not give up with them. It's just that I'm also appreciating other things that are crossing my way. And I know, that even if I don't want them forever, they will come back to my mind extremely present one day, and I will miss them.